Sunday, June 8, 2008
I'm not one for personal blog entries. On occasion, however, I have the urge and find the need to publish non-photographic posts. Even now, as I visit my page in its "under construction" state, I realize that so too am I. The last year has been no party. Perhaps, more accurately, the last few years I have become increasingly discontent; increasingly impatient. It's the hardest thing in the world to know that "something" is going to happen, but never know when or if that "something" is going to be what you want, what you've been working towards. In no uncertain terms maybe it is simply that I don't "know" something is going to happen, but rather think that there is nothing else but for something to happen. It's the old "something's got to give." It's the quintessential: keep the coins, I just want change. It's funny the things you imagine happening in your life. This marks the year in which I had a specific set of things I wanted to have already accomplished; things several years ago I envisioned myself taking part in and becoming. None of them have happened; no far from it. And by no means in the foreseeable future (which, in itself, is oxymoronic) do I expect them to happen. That is just life. You plan and things don't work out, and you don't plan and realize you should have. It's the paradox of life. Yet at the same time life is simply the culmination of things going wrong and plans not working out as we envision them and what we do with the pieces our daily tragedies and earth shattering disasters leave us. Life is the tapestry of many random threads only if we weave it. It's knowing when to walk away from closed doors instead of trying to pick locks and break windows. It's knowing that all we need is what we have, and that everything else is just a blessing. And while knowing these things it is just as much to know them as it is, to quote, to be "completely, perfectly, and incandescently happy."
Labels: freelance
posted by Melissa at 1:37 PM
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